Oh Idas I am so sorry to read this...waaaay more on your plate then anyone should have.
I think you know what your options are..none of them easy. We had to put my dad in the nursing home when he became combative and my mom became afraid of him. At least there, he could be cared for by a team and it wasn't one persons responsibility.
Those hard decisions are hopefully made with love...I know yours would be....