((hugs))

just wanted to send you a hug it sounds like you had a bad day or two.

Hate to tell you, but I am one of those people that MUST get up. I have been that way since I was a kid. I would work 12 hours, go to school, and was raising a kid, while doing chemo as a single parent. its a HARD thing to do, and just because they make it look easy, doesnt mean that it is. I cant count the hours that I drove home in tears because I was so exhausted, spent, and worn out. It was important to my child that I go see his play, or football game, so...i went. it was important to my career that I take this class. it meant a huge pay bump, so...i went. If I didnt wipe up the spilled milk, there was no one else behind me begging to get to it, so...it became my job to keep a clean house. I to this day have NO clue how I did all the things I did, and I am not even sure I thought myself capable. I took ONE event at a time, sometimes one part of an event at a time. Sometimes there are things we MUST do, for ourselves, our families, our careers that while our bodies are screaming, and kicking to go lay down, we know to do so would mean I was going to pull the covers over my head and not come out for weeks. If I cant come out for weeks, then I am not going to go there to start with. yes! i would have loved to sit and read a book, but the path that I chose wouldnt allow that. If someone asked "why are you here?" I wasnt going to give the whiney, "you cant believe the day I have had and I dont want to be here, but feel I will be fired or left behind if i didnt come." its just socially polite to say "i wouldnt have missed it!" so, sometimes behind those shiney smiley faces, is another human being in pain, and struggling. I know. I was one of them.

I hope you feel better.