Wendy...you definitely have a cause for feeling hurt, left out, betrayed. It is so very sad that sometimes even the people who really love us shut us out of their lives because they believe we must be "tainted" or something because of our medical conditions. Or else they assume we must be faking somehow, using it as a crutch.

As far as letting your guard down once in a while, I don't see how you can ever totally avoid that when you're a kind and caring person. Being nice often equates to being vulnerable, and there's no way around that. Still, I'd rather be hurt once in a while than turn into a hard and spiteful person.

Just last week my father surprised me by giving me a car to drive. A nice little used Dodge Avenger, complete with tags, insurance, and a full tank of gas. I was so thrilled I wanted to hug him bigtime. But then he went and spoiled it all by giving me a lecture about how now that I had wheels, I could go back to being a "normal person" again. I didn't know what to say. I am a normal person. It just so happens that I live with a chronic condition. Ten cars wouldn't take that away.

So I can definitely get a sense of where you're coming from. I know that being in pain already, you definitely could do without more. But I think it's better to continue to be yourself, and not let the ignorance of others make you into someone who's brittle. I wish you the best of luck, and hope that your sister, and the rest of your family, realize what a blessing you can be just as you are right now.

Idealist