It has taken me a while to come back to this. I appreciate all the input. David, your insight is amazing. And it is right on. Spoken as only one who fights the battle can speak it. So I try to apply it. I begin with the 12 year old, who never even heard the word 'suicide' and yet, had some idea that bowing out of life was the only answer, and a lure it is indeed. How rational, would you say, is a 12 year old? Who would even consider the fact that someone that age would consider such an option. Actually, consider it the only option. Why the only option? Pain can be blinding. I have written several responses to this thread only to have it disappear. Hopefully this one will not. Reaching out requires the ability to communicate. If the ability to communicate is lost, then how can it be regained? In the case of the 12 year old (me) there was no reaching out either before or after, until years later. I think, maybe, there may be shame? ....for feeling this way? It intimates some kind of failure. That feeling that 'I just can't do it' 'I just can't take it' 'there is no other way out'....I wonder if that is part of what makes the reaching out so difficult. That, of course, would be for the first try. I'm not ready to address the other tries at this point. And, of course, I am coming from my point of view. Then I hope to see it from other points of view.

I believe that education would have to occur, not only for the suicidal, but for the public at large. I wonder about a station like PBS. Maybe they would be willing to tackle such a subject. I am thinking about Sesame Street as well. Why not have 'skits' dealing with sad feelings and what to do when they are experienced. We teach children their numbers, their abc's, but not necessarily how to deal with this 'beast' Perhaps, starting very young would help to avert problems in teens, and on up the line.

I think, it is true that people in general do not want to discuss suicide. It goes against the rational mind, and reminds people of their own mortality. "Death" as such is diffcult for most people, even when it is from natural causes. Much less when self-murder is involved.

I also wonder why suicide is not seen as an illness. There is plenty of information out there about preventing, treating, and dealing with cancer, diabetes, etc. But what about those who fight, or deal with, suicidal thoughts often. The silence needs to be broken. I know there are people trying to do that. Why don't we, as a society, want to confront it? Why are we so focused on always being happy? Tragedy, emotional pain, mental illness, and loss, are real. Everyone will struggle at some point in their life, no matter what they have or don't have. So, what is the difference between one who would never consider the suicide option, and one who does? I think it is a complicated issue. Each individual suicide, whether 'successful' or not, is unique to the individual making it. But, I think, the basic elements, pain, worry, anguish, inner turmoil, and the confusion it creates are all there. Yes, there may be alcohol and/or drugs involved as well. This can further impair ones ability to be 'rational.' Or, perhaps, it eases the guard down that one puts up keeping them from crossing that threshold. And now, they feel, that they can cross it. And, unfortunately, many do. The stigma is real, and it is seen as a weakness. Who wants to be considered weak? Another reason, I think, a person may not reach out.

At first you don't know and you may survive the fall or you may not. Then, you do know. (Alffe's analogy of the hole in the sidewalk) But it takes education to 'know' And it takes education to learn how to deal with suicidal thoughts. I think we need to try to remember as much as we can that Pter learned, and how he navigated through these thoughts without acting on them. Some people will have them and never act. Others will. I'm not sure yet what makes the difference. But I am learning how to navigate through them. I hope to share some of that. I will be brave and admit that I do deal with them more often than I would like to. But, I try, not to let it control my life. I am learning to re-direct, or just watch, those thoughts parade by without 'falling into them' (again, the analogy of the hole in the sidewalk)...
Ok, I guess, I am full of it today........