Originally Posted by Evonne

It has been awhile since I last posted. The last time was right after I saw the MDS for the first time. Just to refresh, he was trying to rule out things other than PD that can cause PD like symptoms. He checked me for Thyroiditis, and something called Paraneoplastic Syndrome. I got the results of the tests the other day and the results were all within the normal range. I was especially relieved regarding the Paraneoplastic Syndrome test results...that could have indicated cancer in my body. On another note, my GAD levels were elevated and that can indicate Stiff Person Syndrome. I am still waiting to be scheduled for an EMG and that will give us more of an idea of how my nerves are reacting to the stimuli and I guess that can tell more of a story about what is going on inside of my body.

At this point I am not sure what to think. I am off of all medications right now as per the MDS and I am not doing very well. I am stiff, achy and tremulus. My left elbow seems to be more stiff with each passing day. Another thing that I am experiencing is fasciculations. You know...those annoying little twitches that happen. They happen pretty regularly througout the day although they are most noticeable upon waking in the morning and when I lay own to go to sleep at night. I am not sure if this is a PD thing or if it might be an indicator of another motor neuron disease...ALS. I really think that the EMG will clear alot of this up and I can't wait to get that over with.

Last week I was at home and I injured my knee by bending and twisting the wrong way and I have been off of work since. At first, they told me that I had torn my meniscus, then after the radiologist reviewed the MRI they said that it wasn't torn, just badly bruised and swollen and my tendons were really stretched. NOT GOOD for many reasons!!! I have only been working at the hospital for a couple of weeks and I am still on probation. If I can't return by Thursday, I will lose my job...or as they put it have to resign and reapply at a later time. I am seriously beginning to question whether or not I will be able to perform the duties of this Nursing Assistant job. It is very physical and I am a physical train wreck right now...no doubt. I may well be forced to accept that it is probably not a good idea to continue on with a job that will cause me more physical wear and tear on my body. I lift people squat and bend all of the time and I think that really contributed to my knee problem....although the final injury occurred at home. I am frustrated by all of this because I feel a responsibility to help provide for my family because we can't make it on just my husbands income. I need to do something...I can't just give up, but I don't know what else I can do or where to even begin. My husband seems to think that I could qualify for disability but I don't know how that works. I am only 33 years old I find it upsetting to even think about disability at this point in my life.

Through all of this I have been on another emotional roller coaster ride. Some of it is probably is related to the fact that I am off of the Mirapex so my "fake" dopamine is gone and some of the positive feelings I had are gone right along with it! On the positive side...it is SO nice to have ankles again! I just feel like I am at another crossroads in my life and I don't know where to go next. It seems like the past two years of my life have just been one trial after another and I am ready to have some peace in my life...I am ready NOW!!! I just wish I could get some clear sign from God about what I should do next. I think he is still trying to teach me to trust more in him and to be more patient. I just don't know HOW to do that more than I already have. I am about half way through the book "The Shack" and I am finding that helpful.

Well, that is all I have to update on so far...and that was quite an update. I guess I am just a wordy type of person! Thanks to all of you who take the time to read my posts and comment on them offering support. You guys are awesome!