Kelly,

If you are being a big baby, then let me get in the playpen too. I have the same concerns.

I think about this alot. What if's ??? What if I fall down, or wake up and cannot move? How long will it take for people to notice I am not around or not answering my phone? I have estimated that it could take up to 2 days for help to arrive if it happened on a weekend. My closest siblings live over 500 miles away, and they are not exactly jumping up and down and saying that I can live with them in the future if I needed help. I have seen how they sometimes get annoyed with my mother when she needs help so ... It is easier to just tell them I am doing okay, and then they get shocked when they see me.

My younger sister has said that I could live with or near them in Texas when I retire or have to quit teaching, but then she keeps reminding me of how hot it is down there.

I know they all would help me, but I do not want to ruin their lives with my problems.

So, I have been paying off all of my credit cards and car, and should be completely out of debt by the end of summer. I am also trying to save money although I have lost 1/3 of my IRA in the past several months. I have been checking out the costs of assisted living facilities. I probably could afford one as long as the great State of Illinois pays my pensions.

So I have done some planning, but I know I probably should meet with an attorney to decide on other issues, including my wishes regarding medical issues.

So know you are not alone. I have always been independent, but now I often feel envious of those who have a supportive spouse. But then I have also read posts from individuals who spouses are leaving them or cruel to them because they have MS.