Lori Lee
I am glad you got something helpful from my post. I have been exactly where you are so I know precisely how you are feeling. If you don't already have an anti-depressant in your drug cocktail, I recommend that you give it serious consideration. I had excellent results with duloxetine (cymbalta) in terms of pain management but it also helped my mood when I was really struggling. The side effects were not as debilitating as might be experienced with some of the older anti-dep medications, especially the tri-cyclics.

You need to think of this as a long journey and not a sprint so don't dismiss taking yet more medication which could get you through the early, tough points. It needn't be for ever - it may be something you take for a short-to-medium term period and then you can wean off it later as you improve either physially or mentally. It is key though to get your mood and pain under control asap - that has got to be your priority and after that you can start to slowly rebuild things as and when you feel up to it.

You must see people coming through ICU with horrific injuries and illnesses - you know that the time they are with you is just the start of their recovery and rehab journey. You wouldn't advise them to try and cope with what has happened to them in a couple of months so why should you be any different?

I too am saddled with the burden of the Type-A personality!! You have to realise that it won't help to keep wanting to get answers and then get fixed tomorrow. It doesn't work that way. The Type-A black and white, deal with it and move on, lack of patience stuff doesn't help on the CRPS acceptance journey. Your Type-A personality will come into its own though by giving you the determination to fight through the pain and to keep going when others might give up. It will give you strength to keep going when you don't think you can.

I was still trying to struggle through my achilles rehab at the point you are at. I hadn't been diagnosed and I felt that everyone must think I just wasn't trying hard enough. It was terrible. My physio rapidly realised something was wrong and after 6/7 weeks I got my diagnosis. In some ways it was good when I didn't know - I just kept pushing on with the rehab even though it was agony and I wasn't making the progress that I should have done. Getting my ankle moving and getting a sock and shoe on (standing over the sink vomiting with the pain) has stood me in good stead for later.

I later found another physio who had treated CRPS and just as things were starting to look brighter, I developed a severe movement disorder which is the most disabling feature of the symptoms for me. My pain has changed and subsided over the last 16 months - partly time, partly walking, partly mood and partly drugs. I have a bit of spread to my other ankle and foot but it isn't too bad pain wise. I have awful neuro pain in both hands and arms but I think it is probably carpal tunnel syndrome from crutch and wheelchair use rather than CRPS spread - it remains to be seen.

I have had ups and downs over my journey and I am terrified that I am currently about to have another spell of mood bleakness - I'd rather have the pain than the depression. All I can do is try my best, recognise when it starts to get bad and try to ask for help before it gets too bad. I have been lucky not to have the added stress of children or money worries but I am sure that you and your family will get through these tough times. They will continue to love you and wish for the best for you. Accept their help and use that Type-A personality for all it is worth!!