Ali - I am sorry I didn't see this sooner. My heart goes out to you and your family. I hope things are getting better for you. I understand how hard it is to keep the last memory of someone with you, but please do your best to remember the good time - the smiles - the hugs and I love you's instead of the last moments of tubes.
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Tough Times Don't Last ~ Tough People Do
Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be NO courage unless you're scared.