Nikki,
Your post brought tears to my eyes as well.... I see what alzheimers does to people every day i go to work and i have learned to hate it too.... You are right, You lost your husband long ago. I'm so sorry.
We lost one of our alzheimers residents new years eve. I was talking to his wife today as she was moving her things out of their room into her daughters house. Her name is Nadine. Nadine told me that when Rosco (her husband) was first diagnosed with alzheimers, that she decided right then that she would be his soul caregiver. it got to the point that she couldnt and that was when they moved to the place i work at. she said facing the fact that she could no longer do it by herself was so freeing. You are making the right decision with Lynn. Please find a place for him as soon as possible.
Your health is so important and trying to take care of Lynn, plus caring for your mom has taken its toll on you. We love you..... God loves you!!!!!! You are an amazing person.