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Old 01-06-2009, 12:27 AM
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hollym hollym is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,690
15 yr Member
hollym hollym is offline
Senior Member
hollym's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,690
15 yr Member
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You just keep staying calm about it. My mom never was judgemental with my decisions at that age and I grew much closer to her over time and more dependent on her from afar. I moved from Oregon to Pennsylvania for a guy when I was 19 (sound familiar?). He turned out to be the wrong guy, but I found the right one when I was here, so it all worked out and I've been married to him for nearly 17 years.

I always felt like I could call her and lean on her and we truly were closer than we ever were when I lived nearer. I called her probably nearly every day until the last couple of years of her life when she just couldn't accept my illness and I felt so abandoned. That was when there was real distance between us.

I guess my big point is that you are doing the right thing by supporting and not judging. She will trust you and get closer to you through this. Even if she is living 10 hours away or on the other side of the world, she will still be close to you. I really miss that about my mom. For so many years, I could just pick up the phone anytime and be with her. That wouldn't have been possible if she had come across as harsh or judgemental about my "bad" choice to move out here for a guy who turned out to be a jerk. She was there for me when that went bad and there for me again when I found Mike and things were good. Oh how I miss her....
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Take me back to days full of monkeyshines
Bouncin' on a bubble full of trouble in the summer sun
Keep your raft from the riverboat
Fiction over fact always has my vote
And wrinkles only go where the smiles have been...

Jimmy Buffett from "Barefoot Children in the Rain"


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