Pain meds just didn't work for me. Next month starts my 8th year with this. Started in one foot, now have it in both feet, one calf, one arm and hand, both shoulders, half my back, my neck, half my face.

I have managed to stay working. I am not functioning at full speed ahead, or at a normal person's level - but I think I am doing pretty well, considering.

Topiramate (topamax) helps the pain more than pain meds. Baclofen helps the muscle spasms and sleep. Norvasc, for high blood pressure, really helps the coldness and the swelling and redness. That is pretty much all I take day to day. Sometimes my headache, which I have constantly 24/7 really get bad and I will take tramadol, or if I am not driving, two vicoden.

Hot showers help a bit. Massage therapy helps a LOT, but I cannot afford it 3 x a week like I really need to go. My insurance does not cover it.

What really helped me the most was Shinzen Young's book Break Through Pain. Best $20 bucks or so that I ever spent. Taught me to deal with it. I learned how to - how can I put it - set the pain aside.

I have read your posts before. I hear your suffering. I think I have posted before that you should get this book and try it. I was changed just by reading the book. He explains that there is a saying "Pain and Suffering" but that monks taught him that meditation and the mind can separate the two so that you CAN have pain but not suffer. You need to learn to not be afraid of the pain. Once you can let go of the fear - it really does get better. The pain level may stay the same, but you can cope with it better.

I have an iPhone. It has an iPod in it. I keep relaxing nature sounds in it, as well as Shinzen's CD meditations, and some of my favorite CD's like Carlos Nakai. When I am in severe pain at work, I will go into the restroom, into a stall, and get lost in meditation for 20 minutes. I am NOT good at meditation at all. My mind wanders. But, I am good enough that it helps me!

If you get the book, and have any questions, fmichael here can help you. He helped me. He has been to Young's seminars and really understands the process.

I guess after all this time, I have accepted it. That does not mean that I have given up trying to find something that will help me... I have not. But, I am going to make the best of what I have. If this is the hand I am dealt, I WILL deal with it.

Remember - you can have pain without suffering. Give it a try, you might be surprised.

Gentle hugs to you.....
Jules