Hmmmmm....

What if you said, "Honey, you know I love you. I'll be glad to help you when you begin helping yourself. Call me back when you're ready to take this seriously -- your family does."

I dunno. Just the first thing that popped in my head.

Hey, CayoKay? Where are you?

Mel, Kay had a very very needy friend for several months. I'll bet she could enlighten you.