Where do I start?

I know nothing was going to sober me up until something like The Wreck happened. (pics on my myspace). No matter what I lost; my wife and sons, job, our home, it didn't make me snap me out of it. Those bad things helped create the Eeyore in me. Liquor became my favorite crutch. And I couldn't recognize the cycle until I was in the hospital for 10 weeks; I didn't have what I wanted so I drank. And because I drank, I didn't get what I wanted.

I tried AA before the wreck. Used to go there drunk or start drinking shortly after I left the meeting. I was too far gone for an intervention, my wife leaving and taking our sons hurt but I still drank... because of the hurt.

Addicts and alcoholics and those damned rationalizations. Making excuses for our actions is what keeps us in the hole.

I had to hit my own rock bottom to start digging out. Your friend (and anyone else in the pit) have different 'bottoms'. I even had friends and family 'cut me off'. Still wasn't enough.

So! As far as your friend goes, I offer only two choices:

1. Cut her off. It doen't have to be soap opera dramatic and you don't even have to tell her until she asks. No more communications between you two. You don't need people around you like her.

Redefine "friend". It isn't all take and no give on one persons part. I try to be "friendly" -an adverb- to everyone, but I have few "friends" -a noun. I've had to give that speech to everybody 10 years younger than me when I was in management at different jobs. But this ain't about me.

2 Make the decision for her. If #1 doesn't sit well with you, go the opposite direction. Put her in a car and take her to be admitted to get dried out in a rehab center.

Talk doesn't fix all problems. Action is needed.