Thanks for all the warm responses. Yesterday, she stayed in bed, she said she didn't remember a lot.
So, I got ready went and got my hair trimmed, then off to my domestic violence appt.

I came home, threw another load of her blankets/comforter in the washer and dryer, fed my dogs, gave my mom her night meds, and retreated to my bedroom, I thought awhile, then said I will sleep for a bit. I ended up sleeping till morning, with many little wake-up's of my own.

I will have a good talk with her, because I cannot go through this again. I know from experience it's like talking to the wall, even when they are sober. Oh, and yes she would know right off the bat if I watered down her drinks or the bottle. If I don't buy it, she makes a huge ordeal and I cannot take the mean things she says.

Yes, I have more shoes, LOL and I can afford to live on my own.

I can get Social Services involved, anything I do, my mom will freak. What she is doing is killing herself slowly, I believe a lot is depression, but I could be wrong. I do have Medical Power of Attorney, I am an only child, so there isn't anyone else.

She doesn't understand what I have gone through or going through now. I am sick of hearing over and over things about my husband, he never loved you, he is this and that. I really don't need to hear these things. I was stupid for marrying him, etc....................I am just getting my self esteem back on track.

After all the problems she had, the stroke, seizures, heart attack, almost a year of being in and out of the hospital on her death bed, then the surgery, she should be thankful to be alive, and want to do things. She is 73, yes she is in pain due to arthritis and I understand that, but PT worked wonders for her during and after her hospital ordeal.

I am going to try and talk to her today. I have to see if she did drink yesterday, I will be able to tell by the bottle and what glass's are in her room.
Sad but true.

I have to say - yesterday I felt a lot of bad feelings - they passed, about myself, like the big S.

I am totally overwhelmed, and depression is setting in. I feel so alone in this, but somehow I have to have faith that it will work out. If she doesn't kill herself slowly, I will be the one having a massive heart attack at this rate.

Yes, I am a child of both parents being alcoholics, it's not fun. The strange thing is when she drinks she gets mean, and then just wants to sleep, so why bother drinking??? Then she says afterwards, she feels guilty for drinking. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Well it's another day, what it will bring I don't know. It's only 8:30 am here, and she isn't up yet.

Have a great day, and thanks again everyone. I love you all.

Hugs, Nikko