Brokenfriend, I wish that I could reach through space and hold you with a heartfelt hug. Some of what you describe, I experience. It has gotten so bad that I'm having difficulty even posting online, a place where I finally found understanding and acceptance. I, too, live in a rural area -- I'd have to drive 30-60 miles to attend a support group! It's hard enough to get out of my house to a necessary doctor appt. . . .

I hope that you can find some peace,
reyn