Originally Posted by shezbut

Hi nikkicoop,

Parenting has been very difficult since my brain surgery 3/06, and worsened after the tbi 3/07. My girls were aged 2 and 4 when my life became a shambles. I presume that this emotional battle within myself contributes quite a bit to my depression.

I become overwhelmed rather easily nowadays. Kids just being kids and having fun stresses me out big time! While I understand their rambunctious behavior, my reaction seems instant to me. I try hard to maintain control over my reactions - it is far from easy though! My girls quickly pick up on my stress, and then they become stressed out, and a vicious cycle is born. I have dropped certain activities & picked up others, and have had to limit my days available for work, to reduce general stress level as much as possible.

In the past month or so, I've seen a lot of improvement in my relationships with my daughters. For that, I am eternally grateful! My girls seem to have acquired a better understanding of what I can & cannot handle, and (now anyway) work around my limitations. *knock on wood* It is sad that I can't do ____ like Daddy and most other parents they see. And as soon as that thought pops into my mind, I have a heck of a time bringing myself back up again!

I can understand how you're feeling guilty and sad for your boys. Try very hard not to let those thoughts enter your mind though. In my experience, those thoughts begin one heck of a horribly emotional roller coaster ride!

Best wishes to you ~ take care!
Shez