Quote:
Originally Posted by gardengrl
Hi, I'm new here. Actually I am pretty new to the whole Alzhiemers/Schizophenia/Dementia scene. I'm 49, trying to care for my mom who is 70 diagnosed with all the above.
She had previosly lived with my younger sister the past 12 years. Mom was always known to be "Eccentric" so we always looked at all the (now) tell tale signs as her personality. Long story short..my sister called to tell me she was looking for a bridge to drive off because she couldn't take her behavior anymore! I told her to just drive her down to me...1000 miles away, & she was here the next day with a bag of clothing & a bag of meds,,,LOTS of meds. This was Sept.
I thought I could handle it...I still think I can but only with help! I'm pretty much alone here. My husband is Military & will be deploying to Afghanistan for 15 months soon. I'm really hoping to find some answers & support here. So far every phone call or email to Senoir centers have been dead ends...I'm still totally alone, with many, MANY questions. I want to do the best I can for my mom & keep her out of NH's.
She is receiving SS, Medicare, & Silverscript. We already changed her address with all these places, got her a new Primary care, & have a source for her medication refills. What I need now is some in-home care once in awhile. Because of her "Change of address" her co-pays went from -0- to 15% which sounds ok, but have no $ to pay...She was denied extra help from SS? I need someone to tell me if putting her on my husbands military plan as a dependent would help or make things worse? Any idea?
I feel LOST! I'm struggling to stay strong, I'm a woman of Faith, I Pray, I'm an Organic Nut! I will do & try just about anything to help her....Your help & ideas are more than welcome. I thank you for taking your time to read this! I know reading emails are not so easy when you are a caregiver!
Many Thanks
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Hi,
You and your sister are great daughters to care so much. It's commendable. With those 3 bad Dxs it can be challenging, at best.
How long has you mom been Dx'd?
Twelve years with your sister. I'm not sure it's reality to think you can provide the necessary care for 12 more. Those are progressively worsening conditions. Stages of deterioration.
You do need people to communicate with other carewatchers/givers who will know more than I do about being a carewatcher/giver. I personally had a dear aunt by marriage that came down with those. Not that we ever want to or are being mean, but sometimes there are safety issues for the patient and the caregiver and home that may make it a safer enviornment in a NH for mom's and dad's with these diagnoses. If you're feeling overwhelmed, it's because it is a difficult labor of love to care for your mother with these diagnoses. It's hard being a newbie at something.
You, being one person and those conditions are 24/7, may not be able to provide every need. You do need help.
Here in the hills (KY) people can get RESPIT care, provided by the Department of Human Resources. You said she doesn't qualify. so sorry about that, but sometimes there's exceptions to "NO" because of medical needs, or at least other programs that she can tap into for resources, or maybe something you could qualify for as a caregiver. RESPIT care is a service that the state pays for if they're on state aid/SSI. DHR pays for a caregiver to take the patient for a weekend. Don't know how often. Very helpful for caregivers around here. And here in the hills, most people just don't take no for an answer on the first try.
My heart goes out to you and your mother.
