LOL - I completely understand the all or nothing mentality. When I started running, the first race I wanted to run was not a little 5K, it was a marathon! If you invest in anything, though, I highly recommend a treadmill. You can get the kind that fold up, but honestly, leave it down. Walking 5 minutes here, 5 minutes there is how I started. It slowly builds up endurance, helps blood flow (which helps nervous system pain) and if the pain is too much, you can just step off and get an ibuprofen instead of having to walk all the way back home. I LOVE my little treadmill!

I wish you the best of fortunes, living with pain is not for the faint of heart! Keep that in mind when you feel down, you're enduring every day what other people go through for only short periods of time when they're recovering from injuries. The fact that you live with that pain, means that you are an incredibly strong person even if you feel weak. Your endurance becomes outstanding and if you learn to really live in the midst of it, you'll be an inspiration to others!

Many Blessings,
Lilyth