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Old 12-09-2006, 12:30 PM
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himomdp himomdp is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 109
15 yr Member
himomdp himomdp is offline
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himomdp's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 109
15 yr Member
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Ada,

I'm glad that you got the surgery done and overwith and that you had a good friend at the hospital there with you. I pray that you have a speedy recovery!

You mentioned talking about Bill openly around the house with the kids. You know I lossed my Mom 20 years ago, and even then, people didn't want to speak about it. I found comfort to talk about her. I hope you don't mind me saying that in my opinion, the boy's need this comfort to know that when people pass on that they are not just "forgotten." In their young minds not speaking about their grandfather could be misinterpretted. Just saying simple things as Bill (Grandpa) would like this. Oh Grandpa would be proud of you. Or how would Grandpa do that. And telling stories will add comfort to them in thier grief and yours, Ada.

My Uncle just passed away a few months ago and even though they knew his time was near, it's been very difficult on my Aunt. She has some wonderful friends that has been keeping her quite busy. She attended the local bereavement meetings and has now some new friends that she says are very helpful during this most difficult time. Just like you, this will be her first holiday season without her Husband. She says this is a big step but with her bereavement friends by her side she feels stronger. You might just find a little time for such a meeting in your area.

As for your lovely home, an acre is a lot of home for you to take care of. But, for you to make such a decision to stay, sell, or rent out a room and deal with anothers personality is not a decision to make so soon. You need to heal both physically from your surgery and emotionally from your loss. You have such a supportive family that within time, I bet you dollars to dounuts a solution that will delight you will be found.

I bet you your tree is beautiful. Filling your home with holiday spirit and keeping your home together as normal for yourself and the kids is the best medicine.

Take good care of yourself and be safe. Merry Christmas.

With hugs and aloha, Dana
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