Hello and Welcome to NeuroTalk Kitsapdweller!! It is great to meet you although I am sorry that you have to be here!! Everyone on the forum is so nice and friendly so i'm sure they will be more than happy to help you and answer any questions you may have!!
I am SO sorry to hear about everything that both of your grandsons are going through right now

! I can't imagine how hard this must be on both yourself and your family and friends ... I give you a lot of credit for trying to cope the best you can and for actually wanting to learn more about what is wrong with your grandsons - not many other people would do that unfortunately!!!
Here is the link to the ADHD forum that you might find useful. Everyone there is nice and friendly so hopefully they will be able to help you!:
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/forum39.html
If you need anything, please don't hesitate to ask! I am more than happy to help you in anyway I possibly can and i'm sure many others will be also!
Take care of yourself and I look forward to seeing you around the forum more real soon!! Sending many gentle hugs your way!!!!
Alison.