Hey guys, how you going? I was just reading your posts on OCD and I completely relate. It's so frustrating and robs you of your life. Just a quick update of where I'm up to with OCD...

I've lived with it for 15 years now- mine manifests itself in the scrupulerosity (sp)?form- extreme notions of right and wrong/ good and bad.
I've been through much the same thought patterns as everyone else it seems. Tried religion -bad move for my type , contemplated suicide and whether or not a 'biological malfunction' has a place in the world- (please excuse this term- it is not mean to cause offence, it's what i see myself as), and now I'm concentrating on the neurological side of things. Can I manipulate my neurology? In what ways besides meds? I have decided personally that religion is a human concept so I dont believe any devine intervention is going to occur. The fact is I have a neurological imbalance that so many others suffer from. The question is... if there is no way out am I willing to continue?

I started seeing a new psych and told him all the things that I feel are wrong with me and he said- 'But there are so many things right with you, why don't we start with that'. Problem is, even if the rest of you is right you can't reach it with OCD- it's like a bridge that I can't cross but I have a memory of what the other side 'feels' like. Sometimes I reach a good place where I feel balanced only I'm always aware that I can't stay. Is it worth continuing when you struggle more than you enjoy? I know the person I wanna be- biology wont allow it. CBT has been the greatest help so far- is hope.
Also- it's funny what your neurology will respond to. Also, how much resilience does a person have?

Much love to you guys- I know exactly how it feels.

Molly