Hi I understand and hear your feelings. We have to hold onto hope and I know this is very hard. I too have been in the midst of horrible pain and spreading. Mentally so down and with the same thinking. I am trying to hold hope into the next treatment and doctor at the pain clinic while also now I have more mental support in place. I am sorry you have been waiting so long for help finance wise. Do you have a pain doctor right now? If yes can you call and get an apt ASAP? If not I think you need to find a good pain doctor who deals with RSD.Hopefully if you get pain relief it will help you even with small progress to see better times ahead. I am not making this sound easy because I have been the biggest hopeless person lately but am trying to pull myself out of this but I know when I have a bad pain day those thought creep in but reaching out like you are is good. If you want a buddy I am here and I am sure others as well. I mean that from the heart.
Sandy that is sweet about the dog. I wish I was an animal person and I like others but to be a "parent" not so much unless it was like a very trained helping dog.