hello couragous people!, i've come here to offer a supportive voice to anyone who is low on hope, feels forgotten, abandoned, afraid or is suffering. i've survived all that and more and created a new peace filled reality i once had no idea was even possible. i've made my way back from suicidal ideation to Serenity and learned that while the pain may cause me to pass out, the Fear that lurks behind it is what will ultimately cause the most profound suffering. after almost 8 years of sharing my body with rsd i've even discovered that i can sink ever more deeply into the pain sensations and not xperience suffering and even release the pain!!

i'm not sure how active i will be here, i've kept my distance from support groups since '06, primarilly because of challenges associated with being someone with hi grade pain and physical deficits NOT taking meds or involved with physicians. my Path has unfolded a tad differently, i've been blessed to uncover a gentler approach to embracing an ever declining body. at the same time i realise that there may be others who wonder if anyone ever handles rsd in this way and i do want them to know it can be done.

2 days ago, 2km from home, just walking, the bones in my previously unaffected ankle moved, not in a nice way! i was flooded with nausea, shock messages swamped my whole system, and i chuckled as i asked myself which was worse, the noise i'd just heard or the sensations i was xperiencing?! with my 70lb malamute tethered to me i had to make it home without passing out, yikes!

i did, very very slowly, cussing, a pain releaver i utilise at will, lol.
the ankle was bigger than a tennis ball and rom was almost nonexistant. with gentle massage, using natural extracts in oil, i eventually figured out the bones had slipped like they do in my shoulder and hands, so they had to be moved back into place. and someone had to do that. oh oh, someone looked suspiciously like me, eeek!!

with ice and massage i've gotten the swelling down, somewhat, and heard the 'click' when i did some physio' movements to realign things, now i am forcing myself to lie low today, yippee for the Masters on tv!! i will need to continue to care for this owee with loving kindness until the jangled parts calm down. it is a new area owned by rsd...

whatever else u mite glean from this intro, i'm a totally harmless spirit whose intent is to remain independent and to find ways to ease the suffering of all sentient beings where i can. i seek opportunities to give meaning and purpose to my own journey by sharing aspects of it with those who may find it useful.

wishing u all peace, love, health kath