Hi,
I want to face days with fewer struggles.
Sometimes I feel that the struggles are of my own making because if I could only try a little harder, sleep at night a little earlier, cooperate in eating a better diet, find a way to clean my house so that I do not feel like I am living in squalor, be more efficient at work so I can feel more on top of things, live a mediative / contemplative life so I can feel good about my daily decisions . .

I don't know.
I don't know.
I want to feel better and I want to be a better person.

I think I know what I can do to improve things at least a few degrees, but I am already doing my best.
I wish my best were better.
Or maybe I need a whole new way of looking at this.

. . .feeling lost and frustrated.. .
sometimes I can go through the motions and feel like I am almost pulling it off. . . . these feelings only last for a few moments here and there. . . . I want the moments to turn into days and weeks and become part of my life.

I feel like I am working hard. But maybe I can work harder.



Is it possible to feel mostly good about how you are choosing to life your life that you have been given? Do some people achieve this?


Maybe I need to focus more on my life.
But then, I realize that I am already quite inward focussing. And I am not sure how to stretch out my limited to energy to accomplish new plans / revived goals.




M.