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Magnate
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 2,871
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Magnate
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 2,871
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Abasaki
Note---I copied this over from Children's Health Forum so that more people might read and help Lisa....  Abbie
From Lisa:
My son will be 13 in October. Diagnosed w/Anxiety two years ago when we had him hospitalized for school refusal, as well as loss of interest in any activity outside of our home.
Had a good school year last year, little to no anxiety. This year, moved to middle school (many more kids, larger building), will not stay at school. Refuses to go w/o mom or dad, and when we leave building he follows. Has only been to a couple of classes since the start of the school year four weeks ago. Has always been advanced academically, has always had a lot of friends, and has always done very well in any sport he tries.
We are working w/counselors and he is now on Lexapro which we have been titrating up. Still no school. We keep taking him, he now stays in the building with out a parent, but for only one period where he sits in the guidance counselors office the entire period, because he cannot make himself enter the classroom.
We are at the point of feeling like his anxiety has become a crutch, and he won't try to fight his anxiety. He is in enrolled in a day hospital where he receives therapy daily for the half day he is not supposed to be in school, along w/med checks and group work.
My husband and I are losing our patients, we feel he should be much further along by now. He needs to go back to school. What else should we do? We only allow him computer time (his favorite thing) if he goes to class, which he hasn't had in about three weeks. It doesn't seem to be enough incentive. Perhaps we should take away all privledges until he complies. we were giving him video games for going into the counseling center without grief each day.
HELP!
Lisa
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Lisa,
I went through this school phobia, anxiety/panic disorder last year with dd 12. I had a child advocate assist me in having a IEP and home bound from last March through June. NO WAY was she going to the middle school. She would not even attend her gradution to middle school.
In August I finally found an online charter school that was an excellent program I felt comfortable that she would be given and individualized program. She had an IQ done also at the home school, then placements at the Charter school/ There are no meds, she refuses. But has asked if they really could help her and resolve the sadness and anxiousness.
She has to be pushed to get the school work done, as she does not sleep properly she can be up all night doing school work at 4 am, finishing at 10 am. Structure is not strong. She does like school though.
Subjects have hard cover books, Books on CD, a link on the study pages for that day linking to the reading work.
They have a teachlet to present the subject topic, there are work problems and questions, a movie short, then there are Live lessons twice a week with her class for an hour with each teacher. Tutoring is available. The lessons are recorded to re-watch or if they are missed she can view one later. Homework is put in a drop box email, or mailed in. There are quizes, reviews and test on sections. Also, reports and hands on projects in science, social studies, Art.
If kids want to do a foreign language, play a recorder in group sessions, clubs, etc to keep the kids connected, but less invasive. The kids can or don't have to use microphones to talk to class and teacher. my dd will not use it. They provide the lap top computer, text, work books, envelopes to mail, Gym is botha health course and Connections approved activities. Anything from dance, karate, YMCA, Yoga, they even ahve Yoga pretzels the kdis have guides with. Even walking a mall, outside path documentation is approved in PA.
You or another adult are the Learning coach. The older the kids the less you are needed. But when the kdis finish work, you OK and approve the submitted item.
Self paced, and the best part, it is free. The amount the school district would receive goes to the charter school. We are using Connections Academy.
Commonwealth Connections is the PA center. www.connectionsacademy.com
There are psychologist, counselors for the kids, at least 25 school organized group activities across the state for the kids to get together. They specialize in special kids too.
The Bullies and lack of compassion, teasing dd because of her giftedness and shyness just made her feel hated. They teased, took possessions, and tormented her. She could not handle it being sensitive and the sadness with the loss of her sister.
The relief I have had in not fighting over getting her to school, not being threatened with truancy when there was an emotional issue going on, this has been a heaven sent answer.
I do hope though by 10 grade year she wants to go back, or do partial days, just for the socialization.
Now she is saying she wants to be an English teacher....in an online school, and take college online.
She has just started after a year to go out. I had her in a photo club, adults and few teens, take her to lunh meetings for the business association where they love her input.
She is not staying in loungers now, she is putting on casual pull on's with make up and doing her hair at 13 1/2. Her hair is below her butt and natural curly beige color. She does need more physical activity, but a year ago I was lucky to get her out of her bed.
I know the stress you feel and helpless to figure it out. I did it by researching, having my dd try the program, write an agreement. I only wish I had made a more structured school day. She will do good for a while and then be up afraid to fall asleep again for weeks.
The school year is ending, she has a few research projects to complete.
Math work is advance Algebra 8th grade and she is only a 7th grader. Too much stress even if she tested ready for it. Algebra is crazy formulas to retain.
Hugs to you
di
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Pocono area, PA
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