Hi, and welcome. I wish I had some words of wisdom...my heart goes out to you. It sounds as though you've done everything you could possibly do, and that you've decided on "tough love". It sounds right to me, but who am I? Have you been to any kind of family counseling?

Someone here will certainly have some experience with this type of thing, and you'll get some replies and support. There are no easy answers for your situation. You will be in my prayers.