Suicide,
The thought runs through my mind often enough.
I even found myself looking up how to do it.
No good way.

This is a world of pain we live in. Nobody understands it.
Robert, I don't think that your sexual desires are out of the norm, it's part of your body that doesn't cause you pain. I was in two marriages, first, my wife only wanted sex to get pregnant.
Second, sex all the time. Couldn't get enough, but her craziness is now the center of my life, and a wicked divorce I'm going through..

This is a great group of people here, and I'm still a newbie.

Nobody is odd.

People around us, can hold so much sway, and after all, we give it to them, that they can make us feel like crap about ourselves!
(Your wife has an illness, with that drinking).
Don't take ownership of that, too!

Get the help you need, if your family won't, your friends will, if not, FIND friends, or professionals who will!

We're all here for you, as much as we can do.
Feel free to PM me.

Pete
ASB