I don't know. I guess the best word right now is numb.

This weekend is kind of weird. Yesterday was Grandma's birthday and today is Mother's Day - kind of bitter sweet. DH and I went to dinner last night and we toasted Grandma for her birthday while we were out for his birthday (April 26) and Mother's Day. His birthday got kind of lost in the whole hospice thing. Last year, we went out the three of us (DH, me and Grandma) and celebrated Mother's Day and her birthday. Hard to believe so much changed in a year!

I finally made the arrangements for the memorial service. I just couldn't get it together and then it all suddenly fell into place. It will be on Thursday. The funny thing is that was the only day that would work out schedule wise and it turns out that it is my Grandpa's birthday. If he was still alive, he would be 96!! He was 10 years older than Grandma.

I also found the program from Grandpa's memorial service in Grandma's address book when I was calling people and now I know what poem to use on her's. I will use the same one we used for him. Here it is:

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die.