Hi Wildberry,
So sorry that you are going through all of this right now!!
I also understand your fears and concerns and I think that they are completely understandable because of the RSD!! I had to have an ingrown toenail removed last year and I was absolutely terrified and it made my RSD worse (I developed Myoclonic Spasms). My Pain Management Doctor says that my nerves are super hyper in my leg and that I cant have any procedures done really in that limb that involves needles/injections as it will only make things a lot worse.
If I was you, I would sort the problem out that is bothering you the most first should you decide to go ahead with any surgery. That way, you can get the main problem sorted and see how you react and then go ahead with the other surgery if you respond well should you wish.
No Doctor can force you into doing any surgery that you don't want to do - it HAS to be your decision and no one elses!!!
If you decide to go through with the surgery, please make sure that the doctor performing the op knows about RSD. It is usually suggested that when having surgery of any kind with RSD, you have a nerve block beforehand and then again afterwards to try and prevent any spreading and put an halt to any increases in pain.
I'm sorry that you don't have a support system!

I don't know what I would do without my mum - she has been with me through all of this and helped me sooo much!! I honestly don't know what I would do without her as no one else in my family understands RSD - not even my dad!!! As the others have said though, please know that we are all here for you whenever you need someone to talk to. I know it isn't quite the same as having someone in person to talk to but we understand what you are going through and will try and help you if we can !!
I wish I could give you more advice but I can't unfortunately. Listen to your body and go with your gut instinct - you know your body better than anyone else!!
Good Luck with your decision and please keep us posted - I know you will make the right choice!!
Alison.