Originally Posted by Nik-key

Maybe I said that wrong? I do have happy times in my life... the kids, friends, family.. I surround myself in their love. We do laugh, have good times.

What I am trying to say is I can't let in the happy memories of Dad, of our lives together. It just hurts too much. It is when I think of all we had, that all I lost is too overwhelming. It is when the darker thoughts come. So I push back the happy times, so I don't have to feel so consumed in the loss. Does that make sense to anyone but me?