Thank you Mari, Bizi, and Mrs. Bear.

After I made this post I wanted to dig a hole and bury myself. It is hard to bear my soul but it is very helpful as all of you are so supportive. You all are right, the next part is the making of my new life.

My DV counselor and I also discussed what I was to do during the Holidays after my trip to the nursing home. She suggested I call my church and ask for a ride to church Christmas Eve since I have night blindness. I called a old friend who passed away in 1974, his father-in-law today who lost his wife and my friend last year. He is so lonely like I am. I should go see him over the Holidays. He does have one daughter with him and his grandson. I may buy him something for Christmas for the family like cookies or something and give them to them for Christmas. He's on the way home from the nursing home so it would not be out of my way. I'd love to hear him tell stories of the ones who have passed on that I knew.

befuddled2