I was reading some verses in the Psalms this morning,and when I read this,you came to my mind.

Psalm 62:3,4
3 You will be a crown of splendor in the Lord's hand,a royal diadem in the hand of your God.
4 No longer will they call you Deserted,...

I feel that you feel deserted by your Dad. He didn't desert you. Maybe he suddenly snaped,and saw,and felt his world of pain close in.

He loved you dearly Nik-key. I don't think that he realized the pain that it would cause you at that time. BF