BF - I can sure relate. But part of the healing process as mentioned, is finding yourself again. I cry a lot too, but it is a good release.

As the days approach the holidays, I have a sick feeling, had nightmares/dreams last night of my husband. Woke up feeling depressed and very emotional.

I wish I had the answers, all I do is keep going to DV counseling, keep taking my meds, and hope and pray one day this is all behind me. I don't know how long it lasts, it's different for everyone.

Sounds like you have a good plan for the Holidays are that is real important, it's great you are going to be with people too.

Lots of Hugs and Hope, Nikko