Thank you for the responses.

I just don't get it. I'm actually asking people for help, and they're turning away. This one guy I used to kind of date really understood my feelings of depression and my OCD. He always said he'd never hold it against me, that he'd always be tolerant. Now, I'm sending him texts telling him I'm not ok and he's ignoring me. Why doesn't he care if I end things? Isn't it GOOD that I'm telling people I'm not ok? Aren't people supposed to WANT me to be ok? I don't get it. I know he's getting my messages. What have I done for someone not to care if I'm dead or alive?

Even my female friends are getting sick of the same old sad story I have to give. I don't speak because I want attention. I speak because my thoughts just keep going around and around in my head and I can't let them do that forever, so I talk.

Why am I reaching out and having people turn away? I'm actually ASKING for help. I thought that was the right step....