I'm sinking again. I don't know why I do okay in the morning and then become so vulnerable to my thoughts in the evening.

I can't take it that no one in my life cares that I'm calling for help. These are people that have said I love you to me, and now? Now they're nowhere. They're straight up ignoring me. I can't take this pain, you guys. I'm so sad. I just want him to pick up the phone and tell me I'll be ok, and he's not. How is someone so disgusted by me as a person that they don't care enough to pick up? Why am I being judged?

I think I need to go for a bit. Something in my head isn't right. I have such good moments in the day and now this. I think I need to drive all night or something. I don't know how I'm going to start my job tomorrow, though that's the least of my worries. I'm so consumed by people that don't want me in their lives and how bad it stings.

I'm crashing. I'm falling. I'm so damaged. I'm so hurt. I want everyone to call me and see how I'm doing, yet I only have one friend that is still sticking around. I'm so destroyed.

I'm sorry.