Money seems to be the answer, When dad started showing signs he needed 24/7 care, we got him a lovely private place with huge private troom, with a living room section in it (it was huge!!), private bath, lovely dining room not far away. Then the Alzheimers got really bad. He ended in a locked ward, private room but not so big. His wife "sprung" him, but she could not care for him. Think any money was gone now, he ended up in a bed most of time with a room-mate - know we never heard that guy speak, a real nursing home, hot, stinky, depressing. Some lady met up with my kids in waiting area and talked about severed heads and stuff, which amused and delighted the 10 year olds. His old wife Sprung" him, we didn't protest, he received better attention and care from that old woman than in nursing home. She eventually hired a home health aide, who got a cell phone in the old ladies name and called a foreign country all the time on it. My step-mother, not really reading the bills, paid it. My Dad died at home, his wife got sick, later ended up in a small room nursing home. She got sick, ended up in hospital, didn't want to leave, they let her stay, she died there. My old aunt went to a "cheap" Medicaid home with a a very disturbed room-mate. Lost many things. I don't know if my rich cousin interceded (she had no kids and was everyone's favorite aunt. ) She ended up in a real house, private room, run by a lady and seemed to do better. My Mom didn't ever want to be an old lady, seems she got her wish with lung cancer, died at 63, having never gone anywhere but hospital. Like her, I hope to never leave home but doubt that's in my control.