Dear Manda, there is absolutely no reason to feel you need to say sorry for feeling the way you are feeling. Your feelings are real and your expressing them is important. Nothing to say sorry for Manda.
Your title thread reminded me of Bob Dylan's words from Knocking on Heaven's Door...
:That long black cloud is comin' down :
It does feel that way for you at the moment by the sound of it.
You will get through this you know. You just have to keep kicking that black cloud away.
P.S. I've just read a great post you made a week or so ago... here's a little reminder.
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/post523348-56.html