Thank you all for the words, the music, the reminders...I appreciate it.

I can't believe I'm struggling so bad. I'm kind of getting angry with myself and I feel so needy I hate it!

That guy really messed with the trust I put in people. So there are only like 3people I honestly trust. And 2 of them want nothing to do with me. Won't answer my calls or anything. So I'm left with one person I trust that I can tell is starting to get fed up with me. I really do feel alone. I know people care. But I feel like I'm standing in a field alone. No one is around. What makes it worse is, the guy that I trust and have been trying to get a hold of probably thinks I'm obsessed with him on a romantic level...which is NOT the case. I just really could've used his shoulder to cry on a couple of times. But now everyone is taking their shoulders away. I'm physically alone. I don't know how to cope with that. Do NOT get me wrong, you guys have become a family to me and I love all of you. It's just hard when I can't go to people I actually can see and go and get hugs from. I know I should talk to a psych, but at the same time, I want REAL people that still want to be around me.

I know, the same old story. I just don't know how to frame this in a positive light. I don't know how to finish the sentence "people distancing themselves from me is a good thing because ______________________"

Ugh.