Thank you for all of your replys! The feeling of not being alone is a very powerful one!

I can relate to most of your feelings and visions of the disease!

My biggest fears are going blind and not being able to take care of my daughter. I'm a single mom of a gorgeous 19 month old.. Obviously she is motivation enough to stay positive.

I think the fear comes from deep deep inside, since you know that you can't really do anything about the disease. You know worst days are ahead. Even if you smile and say, Hey! that's the way my life is.. might as well just live with it and stay positive. You still know you're going to fall down the cliff and be unsure of how you'll be after the fall. I guess I hate not being in control and not knowing. Makes me feel weak in a way!

Anwyays, again, thanks to all of you! I really appreciate your responses!