I am sorry this happened to you ...In my 41yrs of marriage I have seen my husband do some pretty amazing and sometimes hurtful things.
He really can get inconsiderate when ill, or highly stressed.
On a daily basis he is a nice considerate guy...That was a major reason we got together and have lasted this long.

I think stress can make a person do things they would not normally do.

When I get stressed I tend to yell and it is over... he acts it out.
When he had a terrible boss years ago, it was hard living with him sometimes..He'd be so distracted at home and lose his normal self at times. He has always been a quiet type, and I have tried to open communication skills for him and it did work some.

I don't know what else to say...I can only come at this situation you are having from my own experience and point of view.