I'm not ok. I miss my Dad something fierce. I am losing my husband. I am fighting for him, trying to get him to hang on...praying he can regain some strength to stay with me....

It is Dad's birthday next week. God help me, I am mad at him. He should be here! He promised me he would be! I desperately need him.

This song effects me, at first because of Dad... and now because of Lynn. It is in my head all the time. Sometimes I scream the words instead of sing them. Sometimes I cry through the whole song...sometimes I sit numb, wondering how someone else could write just how I feel.

I am breaking, but I am hanging on.......


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axPlLqLmSUw


BROKEN

The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight
Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time
I am here still waiting though I still have my doubts
I am damaged at best, like you've already figured out

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded, I'm an open book instead
I still see your reflection inside of my eyes
That are looking for a purpose, they're still looking for life

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing
with a broken heart that's still beating
In the pain , is there healing
In your name I find meaning
So I'm holdin' on
I'm barely holdin' on to you

I'm hangin' on another day
Just to see what you throw my way
And I'm hanging on to the words you say
You said that I will be OK

The broken lights on the freeway left me here alone
I may have lost my way now, haven't forgotten my way home

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart that's still beating
In the pain, there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I'm holdin' on,
I'm barely holdin' on to you


I'm holdin' on
I'm barely holdin' on to you

....................................

thank you all for the emails and PMs. I am sorry I can't write more than this right now............