Sounds a lot like the caliber of conversation I was having with David's mom in the Spring of 2001 after she broke her hip. One episode lead to another. One test indicated the need for another. One med reacted causing the need for another. We could not get a lot of direction from the docs treating her because each felt that the area s/he was treating was fixable. Together as a package, the problems looked too big to allow her to recover to her previous level of independence.

We ultimately rewrote her living will bulleting the various problems that had been identified and stated , in writing, what she was or was not willing to have done for them. It was a very difficult time for the family and I feel for you.

I will say, she did not recover from all of the procedures and was in a great deal of pain when urgent measures were taken that she'd verbalized not wanting but it was not in writing. When things finally went on paper and were witnessed, her level of comfort became prime for the staff and her last 3 days were very comfortable and full of quality time with those she loved.