I have a sister that is a serious drug addict, alcoholic and abused person. She frequently picks the wrong men in her life to lead her. I am always amazed that she can climb that hard road, do so well, be awesome and then...I get the phone call telling all about Doug! or Jim or Joe or whome ever it is this month. How wonderful he is, and how they are gonna take care of each other, and how she finally found true love! My sister confuses sex with love, and believes if they will have sex with her, they must love her...yes? NO!

I have worked for decades and have had to reach some very tough decisions for myself. My sister is no longer 8 and while I want to protect her, and show her a better way, she doesnt want to hear it. She knows I am here for when she truly needs me. She can call night or day.

I bet your sister knows the same. She KNOWS how much you love her. She knows that you are waiting by the phone to see how she made out. You can be ready by looking up phone numbers for shelters in her area, so she wont have to look them up. Remind her she can call collect. Offer her your plane ticket so she can come to MN if she wants. This way the whole ticket isnt lost. If she doesnt want it, call the airlines, and see if you can either get a refund, or trade it for a trip to another place. You are going to have to trust in her that she will call, and she will bring you up to speed on everything that is happening, but for now, she may just need time and space to clear her own head, and figure out what she wants/needs to get done in order to move forward. Clearly there were larger issues than her falling asleep on the couch, and it was just the topic that broke open the dam.

Just keep telling yourself. she is a grown woman. She knows you are there for her. she can and will make good choices. Before you know it, she will be ringing your phone. If you truly feel she is in danger, you can speak to the local police of the town she was staying in, but she may view that as intrusive, and out of bounds.

PLEASE make sure IF you invite her back into your life, that there are rules, boundaries and limitations about what YOU and your family are willing to tolerate, even for a short visit. I have held a very firm line with my sister, and it has worked miracles for me to NOT sit up and cry all night. I have told her that she is an adult and needs to act like one. I love her, but wont let her take me under again.

Hang in there. you can PM me if you like. I know EXACTLY how you feel.