Susan,
Welcome to this board and keep your thoughts coming our way. You will find the most incredible people who are supportive here on this site. I know you have been thru quite enough for a lifetime, but don't give up or give in, because you have too much to live for! I will keep you in my prayers and I know that God will keep His hand on your life! I count it an honor to be able to keep you in my prayers daily. Keep in touch.
God Bless and Big Hugs to you,
Simon