Today, 12 years ago, I was 14.... and my grandpa was 78 when we lost him...

He died while he was sleeping, heartattack... but he didnt suffer...
Today, 12 years ago, at this time, I still couldnt believe I was not going to see, listen, smell him again...
Today, 12 years after, I still cry... I still miss him like crazy... I know he is listening, I know he is watching me or at least that's what i want to believe, but I jyst wish he was hear... so I could listen his advices and I could tell him all my worries....
I was a completely different girl when he left us... Now I have pain, depression, stress, visual problems, blah, blah, blah... and I feel so nostalgic thinking about grandpa today...
Missing him....