Ada
Sorry to hear,,,,your not alone,I think everyone on this board had contemplated suicide because of rsd,,, I know i have,,it makes you angry,depressed,agitated,resentfull,,ect,,ect,,But God has a way of surcombing us. And i think we all have [exspecially when were in really bad pain] are worried about our stash going low or fear of the dr ,saying no more,,,its like a combination of addiction and affliction,,,,I dont want the meds,,but i dont want the pain,,and of course the body gets used to a certain med ,or amount,,and the pain is the same when doing that amount of medication when your tolerance level goes up,,you would have the same exact pain,if you were clean,,,,,,,so ,,you either add more of the med or stack on top of it another,,or swap out something the body isnt used to yet,,,,,,,either way,its a merry go round from Hell......exercise when you can,,find something you enjoy,,and like pete said,pm me your # if you want to chat....I do [as others here ],feel your pain,your in my prayers,,,,,,,,,,,bobber