Yes, well, everyone is saying they've felt that way. I feel that way; pretty much all the time. It's the freight train inexorably approaching. I can see it, I can feel it, and nothing I do will stop it, slow it down, or get me out of the way. What helps me?

Getting real, for one thing. I can't do something today that I could do yesterday? Fine, get in the moment (as in this is today, not yesterday), and now I've got two choices: find another way (this can include asking for and accepting help from someone else), or don't do it. My life is enough of a struggle without the useless and depressing fight of trying to do something that has passed from "fabulously difficult" to "physically impossible."

Getting more flexible. This includes being able to change my routine when my routine results in negative outcomes. It also includes ditching the false pride and asking for help before a difficult moment becomes terminally difficult.

Having at least one person in actual space and time (not the computer) to whom you can say anything, without that person trying to convince you your reality is distorted and/or screwed up, and blowing sunshine up your butt. For instance, Lisa had to help me to pee the other night. She got me all settled on the couch for the evening, then the moment she walked out I lost control of my bowels. I just lost it. I looked at her through my tears and said:"What would you do if you were me? Would you stay?" She said, "I don't know what I'd do. But I know if my dog was suffering as you do, I'd take her to the vet and have her put to sleep." Of course, then she totally cracked me up by singing softly, "Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly cat, smelly cat, it's not your fault." Laughter through tears. My favorite.

Moving forward within my current reality. Get grab bars. Get a lift. Modify my living space. Get a transfer bench for the shower. See a therapist. Anything, as long as it helps me to cope with reality as it is, not reality as I wish it were.

These things help me.

Chris