Those PHD's liked your work. Sometimes it's a little fear of success. It's sort of like 2 steps forward,and 3 steps backward. I've been through something like this.

When I was in college,I had a mental health emergency. I ended up in a mental hospital. When I got out it felt like I was a book,and the second half of the book was torn out,and lost. I could not see my future anymore. I've never heard anyone explain this problem in this way.

Yes I can relate to what you are saying,and I have sympathy for what you feel. It's a combination of fears.(Fear of failure,Fear of the future,Acute Dread,Fear of not making money,fear of rejection,and all kinds of these things)

That was a long time ago,and Doctors,and scientists know alot more then they use to,and they are accumulating more knowledge as the days go by.

Fear is a very uncomfortable fealing,and I believe it should be talked about more then it is. Some fear is learned,and a truth must cancel out the fear. The fear becomes smaller where it should be.

Hang in there Blue. I believe in you. You will make it through this. BF