Hi Phyxius,

Sadly, over 80% of marriages end after a serious brain injury. I'm struggling to hold mine together mostly using that "pretend nothing is wrong strategy" you mentioned. Yeah, I wonder how that's going to work out...

I know how hard it is to let go of your old self. I'm three years in and I still haven't managed it. However, one thing I've learned is to keep close to the friends and family who are postive and to drift away from the ones who drag me down.

And by positive, I don't mean the mindless cheerleaders who gush over how great you look, deminish your injury by saying they make the same memory mistakes, swear you're just like you always were (really!) and tell you that you'll soon be back to your old job. I'm never going back and these folks just depress me.

On the other hand, I have friends and family that have been great helps in my physical and emotional rehab. These people help me with my cognitive therapy without reminding me how quickly I used to finish the NYTimes crossword. They let me cry when I need to, but always urge me to move forward. The nicest thing a friend ever said to me was, "You're speaking far more smoothly than you were six months ago." This made me feel great because it was honest and I'd worked hard to get there.

I also have new friends since the injury. Virtual friends here and folks from my local support group; great people I never would have met otherwise.

Try to congratulate yourself when you achieve something. I know school is much harder for you than it was before. However, brain injury aside, most people never muster the intellect and work ethic to tackle college.

Cheers