I really want to thank Pete, Loretta and KeepSmilin for all your kind words. Words can't begin to express how I really feel about what was said to me. I really needed all that advice. It all has helped me to be able to pick my chin up a little higher.
I keep trying to reach out to my family, meaning my mom,dad,sisters,bro and my best friend that I thought she was, but for some reason it seems that I keep getting rejected by them. I don't know what else to do. I had gotten into a little arguement with my mom yesterday over why we didn't make it to there place christmas day. She was angry that day as well as all the rest of my family and she told me that she still is. I couldn't help it.We live in the country and our gravels had 1-2 inches of ice on them my husband said it was to dangerous to go so we stayed home. My mom is still a little angry about just that. What can I do to get her to understand? My mom also told me that when my best friend got to her house that she had to use the excuse that her and my brother got into a fight in order to get me to answer her call. That was a complete lie. I answer her calls everytime she called me and answered her texts when she texted me. We promised each other that we had each others backs. I kept my end of the promise up but I feel she didn't cuz she lied to my family and made them even more angry. I told mom that was a complete lie. I always answer her calls everytime she calls and all mom could say to that was "I don't know that is what she said" I asked mom if she believed me and she said yes in a way that I know from being younger and growing up the tone she used was that she really didn't believe me. It hurts that my family would choose her over me and that at least my mom as she put it is still a little angry with me. What do I do? i am expected to just let everything go and move on according to my mom, but she hasn't since christmas so why should I. She isn't the only one hurting here so am i. My best friend try to contact me yesterday and I couldn't even answer her text because i am so hurt that she could go and tell my family one thing and tell me something else. She lied to me. We were suppose to have one anothers backs and she dropped her side. Am I looking at this whole thing wrong or not?Please help me. I am hurting so bad inside that all I can do is cry off and on. I will lock myself in the bathroom or be here in the computer room and cry. I try not to cry but it is real hard right now. If anyone has any ideas for me please help. With all this stress it sure isn't making me feel any better if anything i am hurting more with pain phhsically and emotionally. Please help I feel as if I am drowning. Thank you for listening to my rambling again. I am so sorry, but thank you.


Sincerely,
Tracy